#18. Evolutio0n of Religion
Zoroastrianism was quite content . . . until Judaism came along and adopted the Zoroastrian beliefs in angels, in heaven and hell, in the soul's immortality, in the resurrection, and in the last judgment. Judaism finally shifted their worship to one God, but changed his name from Ahura-Mazad to Yahweh; and Satan became a fallen angel and arch-enemy of God -- a replica of Ahriman in Zoroastrianism. Most likely, none of this bothered the Zorastrians, though the Sadducees sect of Judaism rejected these doctrines (which of course drove them bananas, for sure). However, it was the Jewish sect known as the Pharisees that accepted all of them for Judaism -- and they won out in the end.
Judaism was quite content . . . until Christianity came along and completely revamped Judaism, turning one God into three, negating the Mosaic Commandments as impossible to practice, and establishing the worship of a human being (which of course drove the Jews bananas, for sure). The Jewish Messiah, or Christ, meaning 'anointed of God', was a term held by King Saul, King David, King Solomon, etc.; the Christ was redefined by Christianity to signify deity, that is, a God-being, and the title was given to Jesus of Nazareth. His sacrificial death replaced the Temple sacrifices for sin, once and for all. Sunday replaced the Sabbath Day as a day of rest, the church replaced the synogogue, and the Jewish scriptures were highjacked to be included with their 'New Testament' writings, all of which were now divinely inspired from cover to cover.
Christianity was quite content . . . until Islam came along and completely revamped Christianity, turning three Gods back into one, giving Him an Arabic name, Allah, and declaring the Bible to be corrupted and inaccurate. The Muslims removed Jesus from his throne as the savior of the world, but honored him as a prophet of God, second only to Mohammad, who was sent by Allah to straighten out the errors of the infidels. A new set of scriptures, called the Koran, replaced the fallible 'Book' of the Christians. Allah had no humanistic attributes, developed no relationwhip with His followers, and gave no garantee of entry into heaven, unless they should become martyrs for the cause (which of course drove the Christian bananas, for sure).
Islam was quite content until . . .
#17. Christmas Christian Cuestions
The Christmas story in Matthew tells of wise men (or magi) making the long journey to find the newborn king of the Jews. I offer 10 questions about the so-called "wise men" -- not to be taken seriously, but to be explored with humor and wit and fun. Are you ready?
#1. How many wise men were there?
#2. The wise men brought gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh for Jesus. Were these Christmas gifts or presents for Jesus' birthday?
#3. What would a youngster do with such gifts -- myrrh was a dried sap from a tree used as an embalming ointment at burial?
#4. If they were so wise, why did they follow a star in the sky? Why didn't they simply ask for directions? Oh, yeah! They were men -- got it!
#5. The wise men were from the east, so the star would appear in the west. But the wise men said,
"We have seen his star in the east." -- Help!
#6. "The star went before them till it came to rest over the place where the child was". Really! Could this be a UFO rather than a star? Any thoughts on this?
#7. "(King Herod) found out from (the wise men) the exact time they first saw the star." They probaby came directily across the desert from Babylon to Jerusalem, a distance of at least 540 miles, taking 25 to 30 days by caravan. How long do you think it took them to find Jesus? Herod calculated the time travel to be as much as 2 years!
Could it be they took the scenic route! ???
#8. "And going into the house, (the wise men) saw the child with Mary, his mother." Obviously, Jesus was no longer a baby, but living in the home of Joseph and Mary, which was in a village called Nazareth, in Galilee. But the wise men were led by the star to Jerusalem, in Judea, a distance of 65 miles from the house where Jesus lived. Either the star was confused ... or the wise men weren't so wise. What say ye?
#9. The wise men "departed to their own country by another way." But how did they know the way back home -- not another star, I hope!
#10. Have a Merry Christmas! That's not a question, nor a suggestion, but a requirement. Blessings!
P.S. -- You know what would have happened if there had been
three wise WOMEN instead of three wise MEN ? Well, don’t you? The three wise WOMEN would have:
1. asked for directions,
2. arrived on time,
3. helped deliver the Baby,
4. cleaned the stable,
5. made a casserole, and
6. given practical gifts.
#16. Slice the Banana in Half
Two lesbians, Janet and Lisa, were married in Vermont in 2000 and Lisa gave birth to a child, conceived through artificial insemination. However, the couple legally ended their relationship in 2003. The birth mother moved to Virginia with the child, apparently to avoid giving Janet visitation rights. As a conse- quence of Lisa's contempt of court, the judge in the Miller-Jenkins v. Miller-Jenkins case has transferred custody rights of the now seven year old child to Janet. However, Lisa and her daughter seem to have disappeared, as no one knows of their whereab0uts.
WOW! What a sad story! The loser, of course, is the child. What are the rights of a child nowadays? Where are your thoughts on this matter and what are your feelings? You be the judge!
One day two women who were prostitutes came to Solomon. “Please, my lord,” one of them began, “this woman and I live in the same house. I gave birth to a baby while she was with me in the house. Three days later, she also had a baby. But her baby died during the night. While I was asleep, she laid her dead child in my arms and took mine to sleep beside her. And in the morning, I saw that it wasn’t my son at all.”
Then the other woman interrupted, “It certainly was your son, and the living child is mine.” “No,” the first woman said, “the dead one is yours, and the living one is mine.” And so they argued back and forth before the king.
Then the king said, “Let’s get the facts straight. Both of you claim the living child is yours. All right, bring me a sword. Cut the living child in two and give half to each of these women!”
Then the woman who really was the mother of the living child, and who loved him very much, cried out, “Oh no, my lord! Give her the child—please do not kill him!” But the other woman said, “All right, he will be neither yours nor mine; divide him between us!”
Then the king said, “Do not kill him, but give the baby to the woman who wants him to live, for she is his mother!”
-- I Kings 3:16-27
#15. Christy, the Office Receptionist
Some Christians believe that Christianity is the only true religion. As proof, they quote Jesus saying, "I am the way … no one comes to the Father except through me." (John 14:6 ISV). In other words, Jesus is the only way to God and therefore, the only way to get into heaven when a person dies.
So how could Jesus Christ be the only way to the Father? Maybe Jesus is his Father's body-guard. NO! NO! NO! he didn’t even carry a sword!
OK, then, maybe Jesus is the Father’s personal receptionist. Christ alone decides whether or not a person can enter his Father’s office (heaven).
Joseph prays to G*d. The phone is ringing: "Hello, this is Heaven's Prayer-line."
"Is this Yahweh's Kingdom?" Joe asks.
"Yes it is. My name is Christy. May I help you?"
"Yes, I am Joseph and I want to see Yahweh face to face."
"OK, but the only way is to go through me. Now your name is Joseph, and what is your religion?" "Jewish! I am one of His chosen people!"
"OK, you're scheduled in the calendar. See you when you die."
Mohammed prays to Allah. The phone is ringing: "Hello, this is Heaven's Prayer-line."
"Is this Allah's Kingdom?" Mohammed asks.
"Yes it is. My name is Christy. May I help you?"
"Yes, I am Mohammed and I want to meet with Allah about my virgins."
"OK, but the only way is to go through me. Now your name is Mohammed, and what is your religion?"
"Islam! You don't think I'm an infidel, do you!"
"OK, you're scheduled in the calendar. See you when you die."
Mary prays to Jesus. The phone is ringing: "Hello, this is Heaven's Prayer-line."
"Is this the Kingdom of God?" Mary asks.
"Yes it is. My name is Christy. May I help you?"
"Yes, I am Mary and I want to see my beloved Lord."
"OK, but the only way is to go through me. Now your name is Mary, and what is your religion?"
"Christian! And I'm born again!"
"OK, you're scheduled in the calendar. See you when you die."
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